Earthquake! Really? ๐Ÿšช | Perforated Lines
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โšก April 3, 2024

Earthquake! Really? ๐Ÿšช

Photo by Madelynne, Corrine, Netsie, or any visitor to our house.

Photo by Madelynn, Corrine, Netsie, or any visitor to our house, male or female.

Iโ€™ve been reluctant to show you this photo of our beloved gentle little lovable Harvey, but itโ€™s so darn interesting. Itโ€™s a side of our pet that we never see. Ever. Thatโ€™s why Iโ€™m fascinated with the way his little nose crumples up and his tongue curls and his vampire fangs are unfurled. His curious eyes have become deep pools of hatred because he is afraid, very afraid of strangers. I have seen his eyes as black as this when he is planning a harmless attack, and I know how to take cover fast. I am not afraid.

A long, long time ago, when I needed it most, my aunt-in-law Ida told me how to stop worrying about disasterous things that can go wrong. Donโ€™t worry about fires, tornadoes, stray bumps in the night, nuclear bombs. Donโ€™t worry: Instead, make elaborate plans. Spare no detail as you plan your escape from whatever horror keeps you awake at night. Consider buying equipment, containers; even weaponry.

Cute as a button.

Cute as a button.

The earthquake yesterday was unexpected here on the East Coast of the US, and although I didnโ€™t feel any shaking, still, it was unusually loud. It sounded like a small plane in trouble and overhead and near. Or a big truck on the road planning to crash through the front door โ€ฆ or is the oil burner about to blow up? Do we even have an oil burner? Confusion kept me on the couch instead of diving behind it, and the danger passed in silence. However, getting behind your couch โ€“ or similar heavy piece of furniture โ€“ is one of the best tips for survival I have ever heard.

There is supposed to be a โ€œtriangle of lifeโ€ that occurs when great forces bear down on your comfy ceiling and roof. All the open space is compressed, except for certain safe spaces in a room. Try to get on the floor below the back of your couch or the frame of your bed, or next to a bookcase because that solid mass could, conceivably, stop the crushing of the ceiling upon yourself and your loved ones. Ostensibly.

And books are the most compressed things you might own, so maybe make a book fort behind the couch before the Big One shakes the floors above your head. Or if itโ€™s a tornado, get into the basement if you have one โ€ฆ or choose a safer part of the country to live in, where there is nothing to worry about except coyotes. Fill your bathtub with water if you must, unless thereโ€™s a flood coming. In that case, make sure you have an axe or a hatchet as you try to enter your attic without a net of spider webs smacking into your mouth.

If you are stranded on a raft on the wide wide sea, fishโ€™s eyeballs are a good source of fresh water. The more you learn, the less you fear. The older you get, the more you learn. Plans are an acceptable diversion, blueprints for the facade of control, amusing in their attention to detail. Eventually, you will fail.

Eventually, you will fall asleep. ๐Ÿ”